Her Life...(Fiction) Chapter 2

The memories of Ada's childhood keeps playing on her mind while watching and experiencing the difficulties of life in her present teenage life. She misses those old good days, how to live simple and happy. As she was on her nostalgic moment her mother called out, "Adaaa! Hurry up and move your butt up from the chair. Why are you always lost in your thoughts? are you falling inlove with someone?". "No Mom, I was just recalling the old times when we were happy living a simple life. Time move so fast and it makes our life change after Dad retire from his work. All had been difficult, everything becomes lifeless. I wish we could turn back time." she murmured as she approached her Mom to the kitchen. Ada help her mom in the kitchen cooking for some snacks to sell in the neighborhood. After her mom packed the snacks she will go out with her younger brother Miko to sell the snacks. They will sell all of it and bring the money to their mother. Usually they sold 100 pcs. They can get half profit and it will be their living expense for the next day. While her father would also sell fish around the neighborhood using his bicycle. They can still cope in their daily needs and get to save some for emergency. Her mother is a good money saver, she did everything to help her father in raising money for their family. They worked hard together to support their needs. As she and her brothers were growing their needs also grow. Her parents must think of an option on how to continue supporting them and their schooling. 

She is now in her Junior High when suddenly an opportunity knocks on their door. Their neighbor Mrs. Ming who is a Chinese businesswoman approached her parents and offer her stall in the market for rent temporarily until her son decides to take over her business which is a merchandise and rice supply. It will be left vacant because her son doesn't want to go with their family business. So Mrs. ming told her parents,"If you want you can put a small canteen there." The rent is cheap and her parents agreed. They soon started their small canteen. Ada's parents love to cook and they are both good at it. Her father was a former cook in the boat that's why they decided to put up a food business. As time goes by their canteen was doing all well and many customers are eating there. They hire 2 helpers to wash the dishes and be waitress. Her parents asked her mother's sisters Joy and Teri to be the helper in their canteen. They soon join in and more customers are pouring specially jeepney drivers because there are waitress. Their canteen is located near the jeepney terminal that is why mostly the customers are drivers and conductors. But there are also passerby who eats in their canteen. Their life becomes happy again and little by little they save money to renovate their house into a concrete one. Little by little they can buy appliances like TV and Refrigerator and the a gas stove for their house. Ada and her siblings can now enjoy watching TV at the comfort of their home. They don't need to peek on theirs neighbors window anymore. They can also enjoy the cold water on the fridge and make some ice candy. They feel lucky to get this chance in life and get the opportunity to get the better taste of life. Ada's neighbors were jealous of her parents success specially her Father's siblings. They will make gossip in the neighborhood against her family. But her Parent did nothing towards them. They just continue what they needed to do for their family and their future. Her parents work hard in their business for 3 years. When suddenly the wheels of life turns again...

Mrs. Ming approaches her mother one day. "Mrs. Ming! How are you? What brought you here today?" her mother joyfully greet her then Mrs. Ming smiled back. "Im here to discuss something." Mrs. Ming said. Her mother has no idea what is it all about. She thought it was nothing related to their business. "Yes, Mrs. Ming what is it?" her mother asked. Then there starts their long conversation about her parents business and their canteen is at risk. Ada was just quietly sitting by the window and looking outside while she listens to their conversation. She felt the heaviness in her mother's heart. She waited silently for their conversation to be over. After Mrs. Ming leaved she asked her mother about their conversation. Her mother sit down in the sofa with her and told her everything. "Mrs. Ming wants to take back the stall from us immediately, because her son wants to start new business and they need the stall now. She also reminded me that it was temporary when she lend it to us. And now that her son decided to do their business she wants to take it back. She apologised for this sudden notice. She gave us 3 more months to run the canteen." her mother almost cry with a shoulder down while telling it to her but she cant do anything about it. In the evening when her father came home her mother discussed it with him. Ada saw her father's face turns gloomy. But as usual, his attitude was just go with the flow. " There is nothing we can do. Those 3 years had been helpful to us. We'll find ways to survived. We are lucky enough to experience that part in our life. We learn new things." her father concluded trying to look strong for her mother. He encouraged her mother that they can find ways for new business. "I can do any work to feed this family and give you a good life. Just believed in me and we can work on this together for our family." her father said while giving her mother a shoulder to lean on. Ada's heart felt warm and wet seeing her parents like that. She is thankful to have them as her parents and she wished to be the same when she grow up and have her own family.

Then 3 months passed by so fast...

To be continued..

Thank you for reading and keep updated on the next chapter.

Her Life.. (Fiction) Chapter 1

In a small village there lives a maiden named Ada. She has a small family and raised by a sailor Jose who live nearby the sea. She was the only girl with two younger brother Miko and Gary. Their mother Maria was a tailor and a trader. Their family lives in peace and simple. She remembered when she was little her father would take her to his work and there while her father is working she would be playing all around the big boat. That goes all the time until she reached 6 and its time for her schooling. it was a sad feeling for she cant go with her father at work anymore and she will be getting less time to play. 

"Daddy, daddy, daddy! I want to go with you. Pls! pls! take me with you. I want to come with you at work." Ada was crying out loud but felt helpless to go with her father. Her father assured her," Don't cry anymore baby, when I come back I will get you a present and we buy chocolate in Aunty Jely's store, ok? So stop crying now, you'd be late for your first day of school." So suddenly Ada stops crying and silently went back inside their house made of half cement, wooden bamboo, flywood and their roof was made out of dry coconut leaves. It was a simple house but its her home where they grew love for their family. Ada seen her mother and father so close and sweet with each other. Taking good care of each other always, bidding him a goodbye kiss everytime her father leaves and a welcome home kiss when he returns from work. That's really how she grew up learning that kind of love and care from her parents. 

As she was walking to her new school, she feel a little nervous and yet excited to see how it is to be in school. Her mother said she can learn a lot in school. She can even make new friends. "Really Mommy? I can have more playmates? Can we all go to the garden and play in the grass too?", Ada was feeling so excited all of a sudden. Her mother smiled and say,"Yes you can Ada but you must always be a good girl and behave in school. Always follow what your teacher tell you. Ok?", then Ada answered politely," Yes Mommy I will be a good girl. Don't worry teacher will be happy because I already know how to write my name and I can also count." Then her mother went back home after sending her to school. She promised to fetch her after school. So she behave even when she felt alone after her mother left her. As the class started, the teacher tell them to introduce their self in front of the class. Some children were starting to cry and didn't even bother to stand up from their seats. Only a few of them did. When it was her turn, she bravely stand and smile to the teacher and face her classmates while introducing herself. They seems all so quietly looking at her and some stops crying. She deliver it well and the teacher even made her praised. She feel more confident now. Then suddenly on their recess some of her classmates made her friends. Then they go running around and play. When she get tired she would sit back and take out a paper and draw. That's one of her favorite thing to do. Makes her happy and relax. Her mind is full of ideas and imagination. Then the ring bells.. time is up. Today she survived the first day. She cant wait for tomorrow and learn new things. Her mother collect her from school. While on their way back to her house Ada keeps on talking and telling her mother what she did and what happened in school, she talk non-stop until they reached their home. She play with her younger brother Miko while her mother tends to their youngest Gary, he is barely 1 yr old. She then get her present from her father after he got back from work. He also brings some noodle soup for her mother and she share chocolates with her brothers. It was a picture of a happy family. Simply living peaceful with love and harmony in their small home. It stays that way for 12 years...

To be continued on the next chapter...

Thank you for reading. Keep updated!

Past vs. Present

The past is an integral part of the present. No matter what situation you are in your past determines your present reality. Sometimes our past can teach us overcome and realized the importance of something or someone in our life until its gone. Even the past feelings still affects our behaviors at present specially when we try to remember those memories we left behind and the people that made us feel that way. And sometimes we imitate those feelings again in the present moment. The people that made an impact in our life in the past still matter in our subconscious mind. Some notices it and some dont really mind as long as they are living a happy life in the present reality. I think those who still lingers in the  past has'nt really moved on or should i say they are living in regret. Its ideal if you are aware of your present life than living in the past full of what ifs? Still dreaming for another chance to continue to live with that kind of feeling. We cannot cut the ties of past experiences because we live up to it to be in our present situation. The in between's are the choices we made to settle in the present reality. Our world is big and the universe is infinite its full of mysteries, our situations changes everytime. We cannot hold up to this present moment always for it will be another record of our past when tomorrow comes. Changes are the only constant thing in this world, we need to live up to it to continue to exist. I think its better to live our life with no regret just learning from it everyday. Think of what's really important in  your present life. Who are the people that matters most in your life now and not the one's whom you leaved behind in your past. The present is the one that you choose to have that's why you are living with it. If you already learned from your failures in the past you wouldn't want to experienced the same. And if your happiness from the past really made you happy then keep that feeling and share it with your present reality with the people you have in your life now. That way you can keep the happiness that you need for life. Lingering on the feelings from the people you cherished in the past is really unfair if its not the same person. You should learn how to focus on the present reality of your life including the person you are with now because things on the past that you want to live with and keep forever in your heart would have'nt been lost or failed if you learned to focus at your present situation at certain moment. So learn and focus your life at present, that's what really matters to you now. The sense of responsibility is upon your shoulder. Keep that in mind always, that way we can all avoid disappointments and frustrations. We wont experience depression. Its a very ugly feeling that can bury you alive. Better yet, avoid the negativity and always be hopeful think positive, its like a magnet for good vibes and you will feel lighter; good things happen when you think of goodness only. Most of all keep your faith in God for His plan is bigger than your plan. God knows what to do. Always be good for you'll get the best reward. That's all!

Langkawi Island

Our first family trip this year 2019. Actually today is the Chinese new year celebration. My family went to langkawi island to spend our holiday break. Its time to relax and have fun specially the kids. This trip is our surprised for them.. We tell the kids that were going to a secret place, the excitement and fun comes pouring since the day we make hotel booking and bought tickets to ride on ferry. Langkawi is a tourist spot destination in the Northwest part of Malaysia and its the Duty free capital of this country. We went off to the ferry terminal going to langkawi at noon time. The ferry sails at 2pm. So we still got plenty of time. No worries for there's no traffic jam today. When the kids finds out the secret place that we mention was langkawi they were surprised and when its time for us to go inside the ferry Yuri felt scared a bit. It is the first time for the kids to ride on this kind of transportation. The sea travel takes 3 hrs to reached our destination. Seems like everybody fell asleep except for me. The feeling of excitement keeps me awake.
We arrived in langkawi at 5pm and were all starving. We found a food court beside the exit of the building, the place was crowded and food were simple but tasty and cheaper. After eating we booked a grab taxi, unfortunately the first taxi cancel my booking, then found again the nearby available grab taxi, waited for 10 mins to get in the car, its small but everybody can fit including our luggage's. The driver is quiet hot tempered due to traffic jam. Inside the port terminal area was crowded and many cars coming in and out which causes traffic jamming. Will take more time and patience to exit to main roads. We reached the hotel in 15 mins.. We are amazed of this hotel, simple and classic, family-friendly atmosphere. Most of the people checkin' in were with kids and family. The room is clean and nice with the sea view. It has two bedroom suite, a balcony with kitchen, two baths and drying room. The bed is big enough for us.. Sayuri and Daichi goes swimming soon after we get in our room. The kids pool has a slide where the kids play while swimming. Me and hubby accompany them to the pool, hubby ordered up a beer and coffee together with cordon bleu and a fries side dish. Were relaxing a little, until kids finished swimming. Later in the evening, when everyone gets hungry we went down the lobby where there is an Indian resto beside the souvenirs shop lining up the front desk reception. The food was good and very affordable. The food satisfies our hunger. Burp-burp-burp! We find the souvenir shop fascinating and went to buy some for the kids and mine. Everyone was happy.
The next day, we planned to go at oriental village to see the sky bridge. Before our trip we already pre-booked our tickets. Its a package worth 55rm/adult and 41rm/child which include Star Dome, 3D museum, sky cab gondola and the star Rex. The ticket for the sky glide to go to the sky bridge is separate we need to buy it when we reach the top, the tickets were worth 15rm/adult and 10rm/child. The last activity the Star Rex we didn't push to go because our time was limited and the line up was quiet tiring. Were all sweating cause of the crowd. But it was a fun and happy moments together while waiting for the cue up. When we ride the sky cab it was an amazing panorama view. Breathe taking view and very much fulfilling experience, the sky cab was so exciting and fun but a bit scary if something happen on the cable operation we can be stucked up there hanging.. my oh my a scary thought i had in mind. I hope we dont fall down in the forest. The kids enjoyed much this ride though. Another memorable experience for them and for us as a family. We finished our activity by around past 6pm. Then along the road we decided to have a seafood for dinner.. using the google map we search for resto around the corner and street of pantai cenang road. We found the resto named The Roof, it was a cozy and a bit expensive Chinese seafood resto. The ambiance was rustic with wooden theme. The food was deliciously good. We were satisfied. Then after dinner we went back straight to the hotel. Today's activity was done its tiring but fulfilling seeing the happy face of my family. Hubby is in good mood too. After cleaning up and shower we can finally head to bed and have a peaceful sleep. It was a wonderful evening.
The 3rd day we decided to go for a swim at the pool. Everybody is enjoying, i also got to try the slide a few times with the kids. It feels so great and i feel like a child again. Hahahaha 😂😂😂 but cant continue doing so bcoz im an adult already and its quiet embarrassing for me also. So i just go along and bring the kids at the large pool. Daichi cant reach the pool floor yet so i need to assist him. Then hubby went in the water with us too. We all enjoyed swimming. By lunch time we go on with our sked to go in Pantai cenang area at the big mall there. The mall was named Zon its a duty free mall just beside the langkawi aquarium. First we went to eat for lunch, the kids wanted mc donalds so we had burgers and fries. Later then we go inside the duty free mall and found that the items here were all so cheap. I bought up some chocolate and hubby buy us liquor, its been a long time since he had a drink of his favorite whiskey. I also had one for myself. Hehehe 😁😁😁 Hubby was surprised of the cheap price of the things here specially the alcohol. When buying alcohol you will need to present a government issued ID or passport. Maybe they are checking when you are minor, a foreign national, Muslim or not. I like this place, i wanted to stay a little more days but sad to say we need to go back home in Penang by tomorrow. 😟 I wish we can come back soon again and get a hotel nearby this area. Its so amazing and fun to look around at every corner of the streets. Many shops and likes, also seafood resto's. At this moment i really feel like a real tourist in this area. After shopping, we went to the beach side, the sand beach was so fine, it was fascinating. Many tourist in their swim suits walking by, sun bathing, enjoying the water activities even when the sun is really hot. Hubby let Yuri and ichi try and ride the jet-ski with him. The kids first time experiencing the ride, ichi seemed to fall asleep coz' of the wave maybe and Yuri got a bit scared when the wave goes high and bump into them. But hubby rides it slowly too. After the jet-ski ride we went out on the street where there were lots of souvenirs shop. Buy some and went back to the car we rented. We decided to go back to the hotel and had our dinner with room service. Everybody was tired.. We all had been busy on this holiday, later after dinner hubby and Yuri went for a little swim while i get massage at this hotel's spa. The massage was not so satisfying. A bit disappointed. Thai massage is much better for me. Tonight is a sweet night. Another day pass by, the next day is our last day here in langkawi. We had collected lots of good and fun memories as a family. Before leaving the hotel we had our usual breakfast at the hotel's buffet, after that kids and hubby went for a last plunge in the pool while im keeping and preparing our luggage's. After im done i went down and gave the kids ice cream and hubby's ice latte. Im thankful and grateful for him being a good husband and father to our children. This moment is ours to keep in our memories.
By 12 noon we went down for check out. Wait for the grab taxi to send us to ferry terminal. We missed to see the eagle statue, one of the activity i planned to visit during this trip. We run out of time to do so, maybe next time around when we get to visit here again. I hope we will. Anyway, we took our lunch at Kenny rogers while waiting for our boarding time. After that we went inside the terminal for checking in but sadly hubby lost our printed boarding pass. Now he has to run at the agency to reprint it again. He paid 5rm for that. Until the time comes for us to board at the gate we were the first on the line we were given the seats no. 1-5 its in front row of the ferry. It was more spacious. All the kids and i fall asleep. The trip was fun and tiring at the same time but it was a good time with lots of memories to cherished. Goodbye for now Langkawi.

God bless you all! Have a nice day...c",)

Kids love to play

Link>>>

https://youtu.be/beHYzsHFGFY

Hi guys and gals 🤗😉
Made my kids new YouTube channel. Trying to make upgrading from doing blog to Vlog. Please support and click on the link above to follow and subscribed on my Vlog. Its a video about moments with my family.

Thanks in advance!

Being grateful for each new day everyday

Finally found my time to update on this blog, sorry for the long awaiting moment. Her we go..

By the way i would like to greet everyone who is reading this now a Happy New Year! May we all have a great more meaningful, purposeful and blessed year on this 2019.

I don't make new years resolution on this year because i don't want to get disappointed, so i thought its just better to plan life according to our needs then just go with the flow. But remember, don't expect too much. If great things come and happen then be thankful, if misfortunes happen find its lesson and do better next, still be thankful for it makes u stronger and more better. Be more courageous. That's what I learned from all the past experiences I had. As long as your breathing there's always hope for a better tomorrow. 

In this life we cannot really guarantee to always have a good life but we can make plans to get it. Sometimes in the easiest way and sometimes in the hard way, but still life goes on. We may not get successful yet or maybe your still falling behind or it seems like impossible for us to reached our goals in life still we managed to live each day, still breathing and alive. That's already one thing we should be thankful for that were alive. That means we could still continue to strive until we get a grip on our goals. The fruit of success taste better when we worked hard for it. As I think about working hard to achieved our goals, I feel overwhelmed seeing my husband working hard and doing his responsibility in our family well. I feel blessed and grateful for having him in our life. He is the best for me, our life is balance and we keep our relationship intact. I feel fulfillment in everything that he do for us specially in providing for our family, taking care of us and loving us unconditionally. I'm not saying that he is a perfect man, but he is trying to do things right perfectly. Being a good father to our children and a great partner for me.

We are where we needed be. I believed that its in God's plan why we are here and not anywhere in the world. Penang had been our second home for the last 3 yrs. Our family is living here nicely, although sometimes we also had our tough times but we always survived it. On those moments we learned and try to plan better. In every struggle we encounter we always learn something new and apply it on our daily life. We should be thankful for the hard times experiences for it lets us grow and realized our mistakes so it wont happen again. We strive and fight on the bad moments and try to see the brighter side. We are trying to be more positive now. I'm always an optimist because I have my Faith in God that He will not forsake us. As long as we are good to others and follow his rules we need not to worry because He is our Greatest provider. I believed this from the bottom of my heart. He is our refuge.

I also feel so blessed for my children, they give us so much happiness, enjoyment, love and inspiration. I can say that a children's laughter is the energy that gives us the will to carry-on in our hardships. They are the ones that built the harmony in our family. My wish for them is to experience great things life has to offer and experience to travel more and learn to adapt others culture. That certain knowledge they can learn out of school can give them more confidence in surviving life on their own. So every opportunities that we can get and give to our children to experience the things they needed to grow into a better person we will give it to them. Me and my husband agrees to that. We are building foundations for the future through our children so we must teach them the right things to do. Make them good leaders and ruler of themselves in order to served humanity. Be a good role model to others. This will be as parents can be our greatest achievement. Seeing them to succeed in life and becoming a good citizens in our society is one of our hopes. In God's guidance and love in our hearts we can possibly achieved that goal. For all this things that is offered to us now and for every opportunity to make a better world in the near future, I am thankful and grateful of it.

God bless you all! Have a nice day...c",)

His needs, Her needs by W.F. Harley

Happy Marriage Tips for His Needs Her Needs

The rest of this page is dedicated to providing very helpful resources and tips for a happy marriage that will assist you in building your marriage relationship and helping you discover that you too can have and enjoy a happy marriage, as you work on meeting his needs, her needs. So enjoy this priceless collection of information!

Also, if you know anyone who's interested in strengthening their marriage relationship, home and family, or anyone you believe needs some knowledge to help them with their marriage, or marriage pursuit, feel free to forward them this website's information. Also encourage them to visit often. It's time for marriages to succeed, as we commit to meeting his needs, her needs.

Happy Marriage Tip #1:

Getting the benefit of the doubt is one of His Needs Her Needs

If your partner does something that offends you, such as, break their promise to take you out on a date, stayed out too late, you noticed them conversing for quite a long time with some lady or man, was suppose to help you with some task, but didn't or simply didn't do something they gave their word on, and you are yet to hear his or her explanation for your observation, do not conclude on something negative, but give him or her the benefit of the doubt to explain their reasons.

When your mate notices that you would always hear them out first, without running into conclusions with a grumpy story, they will be more forthcoming with the story or reasons and do so more relaxed, knowing you haven't told yourself a negative story about the situation. Also, when you do this, make sure it is not mere lip service, but let it be obvious that you genuinely would prefer to hear him or her tell you about it, than to believe something negative in your mind. By doing this, you are meeting one of his needs, her needs, which is to be heard out. So exercise some patience. Do this next time.

Happy Marriage Tip #2:

Going the extra mile can be meeting one of His Needs Her Needs

Taking time and putting in a little extra effort to do more than your spouse requested and expects, more often than not, meets some of his needs or her needs that were unspoken. Say for instance, guys, your wife asks you to help her with the dishes one evening, and you went ahead to wipe down the counters and stove as well or ladies, your husband asks you to help him with the packing of his luggage for a business trip, and you went ahead to slip in a love note with a spritz of your perfume.

These little extras could be so appreciated, you won't believe it. Just imagine how it would feel if you were at the receiving end, or if "acts of service" is his or her primary love language. And think about it, isn't it a wonderful feeling that of your own accord, you decided to do a little more than requested or expected? So, whenever you have the opportunity to lend a helping hand, take some time to think of how you could go the extra mile for your sweetheart!

Happy Marriage Tip #3:

Falling in love daily meets one of His Needs Her Needs

You can keep your marriage relationship with your partner really fresh and vibrant by falling in love with him or her on a daily basis. Things like taking turns to plan date nights on a regular basis and mixing in activities that you know are some of his or her favorites, would really make date nights something to anticipate with pure delight. Also, having new things to do each date night will keep this time together fresh and full of suspense. I believe everyone appreciates a pleasant surprise whenever one is given, so keep that in mind as you think of unique and creative things to do.

Now, many of these dates don't necessarily have to involve spending lots of money. It can be absolutely free as you attend your local parks and the historical sites around you. Also, you could simply rent a video to watch together. Giving a shot at something new together such as, learning how to play a game like table tennis (a.k.a ping-pong), golf, tennis or other things like, taking dance lessons or trying out a foreign cuisine. The primary goal here is to spend "quality time" together, where you're doing just about anything, which might be one of his needs, her needs.

Happy Marriage Tip #4:

Unwinding together is one of His Needs Her Needs

After a long day of job responsibilities or getting lost in the hectic world of work and catering to family commitments, spending time together to unwind or decompress after dinner and before bedtime, is a great way of connecting and bringing back those affectionate feelings for each other. Discussing the good, the bad and ugly events of the day is something you should consider an important way to end your day.

Your partner will love this, as you both make it a daily routine. This will help you both look at things together and strengthen each other as you put them in proper perspective. An area of his needs, her needs will certainly be satisfied as you practice this. Do it today!

Happy Marriage Tip #5:

His Needs Her Needs - satisfied by Embracing Your Differences

They say it is usually the unique traits of your partner that attracted you to them at first, that ends up driving you crazy. Now, that does not have to be the case when we learn to embrace their differences, love those differences and express our appreciation of the fact that he or her is different in that way from us, and that we are not embarassed and never will be ashamed or put down by their uniqueness. It could be the way they laugh, walk, talk or react to situations. Now, this is not referring to say, dressing in a provocative manner in public or some extreme situation that is a product of immaturity.

A sense of security is established in their heart, knowing you have fully embraced who they are and have no plans of getting them to change or else. This sense of security is definitely among his needs, or her needs, especially for the ladies; this is certainly one of her needs. You need to give that assurance of security. Admiring his or her differences can help your marriage relationship remain interesting. Honestly, you are really beginning to love your spouse when he or she does something that is way difference from your style, and you love them for it. Think about it.

Happy Marriage Tip #6:

His Needs Her Needs Could Be The Little Things

It is a quite remarkable fact, that water, at 211 degrees is simply hot, but at 212 degrees boils. Just that additional degree makes all of the difference. Similarly, just a little more of something, sometimes makes a lot of impact. It could be a simple touch, such as a gentle squeeze of a shoulder or arm as you pass by your mate. This will usually be well appreciated, as it conveys a meaningful message of love and caring. Do this sometimes, and you will be satisfying one of his needs, her needs.

Something else that could have that same extra-degree-effect and meet one other of his needs, her needs, can be simply expressing appreciation for a kind, selfless gesture done, such as, when he opens your door, or when he or she hands you a plate, or similar acts of kindness. These gestures should be followed with a kind word of appreciation, which shows we notice and appreciate the little things, and that speaks volumes of our sense of respect and politeness. And since this is a marriage relationship, where there are no hidden agendas, receiving and giving compliments should be done freely.

Happy Marriage Tip #7:

His Needs Her Needs: Respect and Love

For a man, respect is the most important thing he values and for a woman, love is the most important thing to her. And so, if a man senses his wife was being disrespectful, he will react in an unloving matter. On the other hand, when a woman senses her husband has just acted unloving, she will react in a disrespectful manner. And the cycle continues.

I strongly believe that when you speak a man's primary love language, he senses respect or sees it as respecting him. The same goes a for lady; when you speak her primary love language, she senses that as love. So for the man, when you sense disrespect from your wife, ask yourself the question, "did I just act in an unloving way?" or "in what way did I just act unloving?". And for the lady, when you feel your husband acted unloving, ask yourself, "did I just act disrespectfully?" or "in what way was I just disrespectful?. Asking yourself these questions, and answering them will help you identify those little things that can lead to conflict, and start learning to avoid them.

Now, to break the cycle mentioned above, you will have to go out of your way to respond differently. Men, you will have to respond lovingly even after sensing disrespect and women, you will have to respond respecfully, even after sensing an unloving attitude. This will end the cycle and get the respect and love flowing again. As you do this today, you will be undoubtedly meeting his needs, her needs.

Happy Marriage Tip #8:

His Needs Her Needs: Optimism and Reassurance

It is always astonishing to see how pessimistic people can be sometimes. Honestly, when they walk into a room, you can feel the depression or despondency. Now, on the other hand, when a person who tends to be appreciative, hopeful and confident about the future or the success of something, walks into the room, you feel your spirit or confidence raised by their presence. Both of these feelings are brought back to one's mind long after the person leaves the room.

So the food for thought is, which of the two are we: The voice of discouragement or the uplifter of the lives of others? If we are not at the place we would so much like to be, in the words of H. Jackson Brown, Jr., it is possible to "Become the Most Positive and Enthusiastic Person You Know".

It all goes back to the stories and thoughts we allow to be created in our minds. No matter what is going on in our lives, as long as we still have reasons to be thankful and grateful for something and make that our focus, we can be the lifting power in the lives of others. So, as an example, the next time you get back home, and walk through the door, thinking about the things you are thankful and grateful for, would keep a pleasant expression on your face. Your partner, seeing that expression, will sure be uplifted, and you will be meeting his needs, her needs, for optimism and reassurance