His needs, Her needs by W.F. Harley

Happy Marriage Tips for His Needs Her Needs

The rest of this page is dedicated to providing very helpful resources and tips for a happy marriage that will assist you in building your marriage relationship and helping you discover that you too can have and enjoy a happy marriage, as you work on meeting his needs, her needs. So enjoy this priceless collection of information!

Also, if you know anyone who's interested in strengthening their marriage relationship, home and family, or anyone you believe needs some knowledge to help them with their marriage, or marriage pursuit, feel free to forward them this website's information. Also encourage them to visit often. It's time for marriages to succeed, as we commit to meeting his needs, her needs.

Happy Marriage Tip #1:

Getting the benefit of the doubt is one of His Needs Her Needs

If your partner does something that offends you, such as, break their promise to take you out on a date, stayed out too late, you noticed them conversing for quite a long time with some lady or man, was suppose to help you with some task, but didn't or simply didn't do something they gave their word on, and you are yet to hear his or her explanation for your observation, do not conclude on something negative, but give him or her the benefit of the doubt to explain their reasons.

When your mate notices that you would always hear them out first, without running into conclusions with a grumpy story, they will be more forthcoming with the story or reasons and do so more relaxed, knowing you haven't told yourself a negative story about the situation. Also, when you do this, make sure it is not mere lip service, but let it be obvious that you genuinely would prefer to hear him or her tell you about it, than to believe something negative in your mind. By doing this, you are meeting one of his needs, her needs, which is to be heard out. So exercise some patience. Do this next time.

Happy Marriage Tip #2:

Going the extra mile can be meeting one of His Needs Her Needs

Taking time and putting in a little extra effort to do more than your spouse requested and expects, more often than not, meets some of his needs or her needs that were unspoken. Say for instance, guys, your wife asks you to help her with the dishes one evening, and you went ahead to wipe down the counters and stove as well or ladies, your husband asks you to help him with the packing of his luggage for a business trip, and you went ahead to slip in a love note with a spritz of your perfume.

These little extras could be so appreciated, you won't believe it. Just imagine how it would feel if you were at the receiving end, or if "acts of service" is his or her primary love language. And think about it, isn't it a wonderful feeling that of your own accord, you decided to do a little more than requested or expected? So, whenever you have the opportunity to lend a helping hand, take some time to think of how you could go the extra mile for your sweetheart!

Happy Marriage Tip #3:

Falling in love daily meets one of His Needs Her Needs

You can keep your marriage relationship with your partner really fresh and vibrant by falling in love with him or her on a daily basis. Things like taking turns to plan date nights on a regular basis and mixing in activities that you know are some of his or her favorites, would really make date nights something to anticipate with pure delight. Also, having new things to do each date night will keep this time together fresh and full of suspense. I believe everyone appreciates a pleasant surprise whenever one is given, so keep that in mind as you think of unique and creative things to do.

Now, many of these dates don't necessarily have to involve spending lots of money. It can be absolutely free as you attend your local parks and the historical sites around you. Also, you could simply rent a video to watch together. Giving a shot at something new together such as, learning how to play a game like table tennis (a.k.a ping-pong), golf, tennis or other things like, taking dance lessons or trying out a foreign cuisine. The primary goal here is to spend "quality time" together, where you're doing just about anything, which might be one of his needs, her needs.

Happy Marriage Tip #4:

Unwinding together is one of His Needs Her Needs

After a long day of job responsibilities or getting lost in the hectic world of work and catering to family commitments, spending time together to unwind or decompress after dinner and before bedtime, is a great way of connecting and bringing back those affectionate feelings for each other. Discussing the good, the bad and ugly events of the day is something you should consider an important way to end your day.

Your partner will love this, as you both make it a daily routine. This will help you both look at things together and strengthen each other as you put them in proper perspective. An area of his needs, her needs will certainly be satisfied as you practice this. Do it today!

Happy Marriage Tip #5:

His Needs Her Needs - satisfied by Embracing Your Differences

They say it is usually the unique traits of your partner that attracted you to them at first, that ends up driving you crazy. Now, that does not have to be the case when we learn to embrace their differences, love those differences and express our appreciation of the fact that he or her is different in that way from us, and that we are not embarassed and never will be ashamed or put down by their uniqueness. It could be the way they laugh, walk, talk or react to situations. Now, this is not referring to say, dressing in a provocative manner in public or some extreme situation that is a product of immaturity.

A sense of security is established in their heart, knowing you have fully embraced who they are and have no plans of getting them to change or else. This sense of security is definitely among his needs, or her needs, especially for the ladies; this is certainly one of her needs. You need to give that assurance of security. Admiring his or her differences can help your marriage relationship remain interesting. Honestly, you are really beginning to love your spouse when he or she does something that is way difference from your style, and you love them for it. Think about it.

Happy Marriage Tip #6:

His Needs Her Needs Could Be The Little Things

It is a quite remarkable fact, that water, at 211 degrees is simply hot, but at 212 degrees boils. Just that additional degree makes all of the difference. Similarly, just a little more of something, sometimes makes a lot of impact. It could be a simple touch, such as a gentle squeeze of a shoulder or arm as you pass by your mate. This will usually be well appreciated, as it conveys a meaningful message of love and caring. Do this sometimes, and you will be satisfying one of his needs, her needs.

Something else that could have that same extra-degree-effect and meet one other of his needs, her needs, can be simply expressing appreciation for a kind, selfless gesture done, such as, when he opens your door, or when he or she hands you a plate, or similar acts of kindness. These gestures should be followed with a kind word of appreciation, which shows we notice and appreciate the little things, and that speaks volumes of our sense of respect and politeness. And since this is a marriage relationship, where there are no hidden agendas, receiving and giving compliments should be done freely.

Happy Marriage Tip #7:

His Needs Her Needs: Respect and Love

For a man, respect is the most important thing he values and for a woman, love is the most important thing to her. And so, if a man senses his wife was being disrespectful, he will react in an unloving matter. On the other hand, when a woman senses her husband has just acted unloving, she will react in a disrespectful manner. And the cycle continues.

I strongly believe that when you speak a man's primary love language, he senses respect or sees it as respecting him. The same goes a for lady; when you speak her primary love language, she senses that as love. So for the man, when you sense disrespect from your wife, ask yourself the question, "did I just act in an unloving way?" or "in what way did I just act unloving?". And for the lady, when you feel your husband acted unloving, ask yourself, "did I just act disrespectfully?" or "in what way was I just disrespectful?. Asking yourself these questions, and answering them will help you identify those little things that can lead to conflict, and start learning to avoid them.

Now, to break the cycle mentioned above, you will have to go out of your way to respond differently. Men, you will have to respond lovingly even after sensing disrespect and women, you will have to respond respecfully, even after sensing an unloving attitude. This will end the cycle and get the respect and love flowing again. As you do this today, you will be undoubtedly meeting his needs, her needs.

Happy Marriage Tip #8:

His Needs Her Needs: Optimism and Reassurance

It is always astonishing to see how pessimistic people can be sometimes. Honestly, when they walk into a room, you can feel the depression or despondency. Now, on the other hand, when a person who tends to be appreciative, hopeful and confident about the future or the success of something, walks into the room, you feel your spirit or confidence raised by their presence. Both of these feelings are brought back to one's mind long after the person leaves the room.

So the food for thought is, which of the two are we: The voice of discouragement or the uplifter of the lives of others? If we are not at the place we would so much like to be, in the words of H. Jackson Brown, Jr., it is possible to "Become the Most Positive and Enthusiastic Person You Know".

It all goes back to the stories and thoughts we allow to be created in our minds. No matter what is going on in our lives, as long as we still have reasons to be thankful and grateful for something and make that our focus, we can be the lifting power in the lives of others. So, as an example, the next time you get back home, and walk through the door, thinking about the things you are thankful and grateful for, would keep a pleasant expression on your face. Your partner, seeing that expression, will sure be uplifted, and you will be meeting his needs, her needs, for optimism and reassurance

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is the key to free yourself from guilt and pride. You dont do it for others but for yourself. Forgiveness is the act of great love. It is never given without love be it for yourself or to others.
I had learned that we can never live in peace if there is even a little hatred or grudges in us.. even when you think you had everything you can never be in peace and be truly happy.
So lets be kind and forgiving to others that offended us not only for their sake, but for ourselves too. I admit we are just human and tends to hurt others and be hurt. But wouldn't it be a better world if we can practice forgiving and giving chances for them to grow and repent on what they've done to us.
The life we have is not in our control.. we can die anytime at any place. So instead of planting bad habits and hurting others and yourself, lets do the most of our life and live better for everyone. Clear your thoughts of the negativity in this world, and emit a light of possitivity to be a reflection to others. Just like a genuine smile that lifts you up for the whole day. And the laughter without holding it to burst out.. such freedom to do so can be achieved when we forgive and be forgiven. Keep calm and always pray for God's guidance.🤗😄😇🙏

Anxious..

Having this feeling of anxiousness really makes my tummy hurt. This cramping pain doesn't give me the justice to feel and do what i had to do. My anxiety is fed up by unsupportive partner that only thinks so negatively. I feel wronged everytime i want to do important things that affects our future. I feel that my wants to do the things that of a priority for me seems to be neglected. How am i supposed to moved forward, to grow and learn when my decisions wasn't on the list of his priorities. I maybe misunderstood, and im tired of being the understanding, patient, listener, and follower to every decision we have to make for our future and our life as a family. It makes my eyes wet with this warm tears 😢😢😢, i only wanted support and be heard.
Lord, pls give me strength to fight for my rights, give me the courage to speak up my concerns and grant me the support that i need. You know my heart and my intensions.. speak through my conscience and give me the right intuition and I will follow thee. Touch the heart of my partner who should support me too. In Jesus name. AMEN 🙏🙏🙏

10 Laws Of Karma That Will Change Your Life

#repost by Life-story

Modern-day life brings us many factors that weigh us down mentally, physically, and spiritually. If these negative aspects of life are allowed to take over and become all-consuming, we can become physically ill or even say or do things to others that could, in turn, be harmful to them thus spreading the poison of negativity. Therefore, it is imperative that we all learn to take care of our own mind, body, and soul. One way we can work to lift the burden of negativity from our shoulders is to be aware of how actions bring consequences. More specifically, we can practice the laws of karma and let that guide us to a life of peace.

Karma is basically an understanding that good becomes good and bad becomes bad, and life is a constant exchange of cause and effect. As we practice the law of karma, we can find inner peace which will give us better mental clarity, better physical health, and also be extended outwards to help others improve their lives.

10 Laws of Karma

THE FIRST LAW OF KARMA – THE GREAT LAW

Known as the Law of Cause and Effect, this law basically says you get what you give. In other words, if you project positivity and happiness to others. Then, in turn, you will receive the same.

THE SECOND LAW OF KARMA – CREATION

Things, both good and bad, don’t just happen. Therefore, create the good and positive things you want to see in your life.

THE THIRD LAW OF KARMA – HUMILITY

Be accepting of the good and bad in your life. Do not dwell on the bad, otherwise those negative feelings associated with it will remain with you.

THE FOURTH LAW OF KARMA – GROWTH

Understand we only have control over ourselves. We cannot change our surroundings, be it people or our environment. We can, however, change who we are in our hearts and minds.

THE FIFTH LAW OF KARMA – RESPONSIBILITY

If something feels wrong, most times the conflict is within ourselves. We represent what is around us, and what is around us mirrors us. Therefore, we must take responsibility for the things in our lives.

THE SIXTH LAW – CONNECTION

Everything in the universe is connected. Even if something seems insignificant, it must be completed as its completion will lay the foundation for the next step in life. Each phase of a project in our lives is equally important as the one before or after it.

THE SEVENTH LAW – FOCUS

One can not truly focus on more than one task at a time. Attempting to do so will open the door to negativity; therefore, staying focused on one thing at a time will bring us peace.

THE EIGHTH LAW – HERE AND NOW

Dwelling on our past prevents us from truly living today and from achieving new personal growth.

THE NINTH LAW – CHANGE

We are destined to repeat history until we learn the lessons needed to change our paths in life.

THE TENTH LAW – PATIENCE AND REWARD

All rewards in life come at a price. True peace and happiness come from doing what we are supposed to do and patiently waiting for the reward as it will come to us when the time is right.

BENEFITS AND TIPS TO PRACTICE LAWS OF KARMA

BENEFITS

Following the laws of karma has many benefits. Ultimately, it will help you de-stress your life, which will also help improve your health by lowering blood pressure and controlling stress hormones that wreak havoc on our bodies. It will let you view the world with new eyes as the dark veil of negativity is vanquished from your life. You will also be able to spread peace and kindness to others which will start a cycle of positivity for everyone.

TIPS TO PRACTICE LAW OF KARMA

In order to effectively practice laws of karma, you must remember a few simple basic concepts:

1. Be kind to yourself.

2. Be kind to others.

Do not beat yourself up over things you can not change. Keep the circle of kindness, sharing, and love in motion so negativity is blocked from everyone that circle impacts. It does not take huge acts to accomplish this. A smile and a friendly nod or sharing a drink of water with a thirsty stranger are simple enough to brighten the day. By following these tips to practice law of karma, happiness and peace will become abundant and infectious among all creatures in life.

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Freedom to love

Been thinking about freedom as a person. Despite our status in the society, gender, age, single or married, being a parent, a sibling, being a child or adult. Inspite of all the responsibilities we have in our family,  to others and to our self. We can still live freely and be happy. I guess it all matters in the mind.

For example, being in love with your other half or someone you love so dearly that feeling makes you happy already. For me love is given unconditionally. If you love someone you will accept him/her for all that he/she is without any judgement. We keep an open mind towards this certain person and we accept the flaws on his/her character. For me, its not the things that you do or did that makes me love you, its because i love you for who you are. So no matter what you do or what you did in the past are all accepted and forgiven. Anyone can make mistakes, even i make mistakes but the point is its the person itself that you love and not the things he/she did or doing.

When someone truly loves you and they know what you deserved they will be the one to adjust on you and change whatever hinders their relationship towards you. They will changed themselves on their own and its not you who need to make them changed themselves. They will do what makes you really happy because they love you more than they can afford not to loose you. Same goes with what you can do to make your love one happy. Loving is not a sacrifice it is in the giving of love we tend to misinterpret that love is a sacrifice because you are sacrificing your own happiness. Well that is not really love, if you are not happy for your self then how can you show it? How can you give it? How can you truly and genuinely love? Love is a feeling that gives us freedom. To choose our decisions, our partners to be, our life to live, and the journey we want to go.

When there is love, there is life. And life should be live with freedom. Its God-given gift to everyone. So lets live life with love.

Getting done with the memories from your ex and the heartbreaks.

I have been there, so I will try and tell you my experience. I once knew the greatest heartbreak and abandonment by the man I loved and who I thought loved me. Remember that there were very powerful chemicals and hormones at play when you first fell in love with someone. I was deeply bonded and I didn’t know how I would ever get through it. That quote, you never know how strong you are until strong is all you can be, truly applied to me. Somehow I rebuilt myself a better stronger person and found happiness and love again.

This is my ““two step” advice to get through heartbreak:

First, deal with him. We need to take him off the pedestal. Somewhere along the line we idealised him and romanticised the idea of being with him. You have to stop making him who you want him to be and see him for who he is. If he walked away, then he is not the right man for you. He couldn’t stay by your side, so he does not have the character you want. So ask yourself why you loved him. All the qualities I loved about my ex, he proved himself not to have, so I loved the illusion of who I believed him to be. Now think about what YOU want in a relationship, like loyalty, strength of character, fidelity, commitment, kindness- does your ex measure up? Now you know you have to let him go- he is not who you thought he was, he is not good enough for you! You have to get closure yourself, because in your mind you still have hope. You are still trying to control the outcome. Close the door forever, accept it’s finished and there is no turning back.

Next, we have to deal with ourselves. We have felt so many emotions that we have to let go of. I carried a deep hurt and sadness in me for what could have been. Sadness for the man he could have been, hurt for the betrayal and loss of the dreams I had of our future. Anger at his recklessness with my heart, and resentment for how easily he dismissed our relationship. What I learnt was that you CAN let go of the emotions, they just emotions and you are stronger than your feelings. What I came to realise was that the beauty of that love was all within me. I was always enough. I learnt to love myself, flaws and all, and when you connect with the pure love within you, you will know to walk away from anyone that does not value and respect you. If anyone does not want you, let them go, you don’t need them, you never did! So journal out your feelings, sit with them, feel them, and let them go. I even spoke to my feelings, and would you believe it, sadness even spoke back to me! It told me I didn’t need to be sad, that he was right for me then, and is no longer right for me now. Once you let go of your emotions, you will find that you gain a clarity and understanding of the relationship. You will be at peace with the past, and you can give yourself wholeheartedly to the man who deserves you. Build a loving, caring relationship with the man who is with you. Take that road to emotional freedom and inner wisdom and life will become an interesting journey for you.

You will never forget him, but you can put him where he needs to be- in your memory and in your past. You want to get to the point where you can look back without the emotional trigger- perhaps with a smile for the love you once had that helped you become the magnificent person you are today, and you will know that your life is exactly as it should be. I have tried to find that hurt and wounded girl I once was, but I can’t find her anymore. In her place is a strong and wise woman, and I am so proud of her.

Today I still have love for that ex, but I don’t see him in the same way anymore. I see him for the emotionally shallow person he was. The years I spent with him remain special, but he is not who I needed in a life partner. He was not strong enough to give me what I needed which was an honest, loving, caring relationship. My husband has given me everything he could not- loyalty, love, commitment, marriage and a family. He makes me feel loved and treasured- what more could I want?

I will end with a quote I found on Pinterest: “ I focused so hard on what I wanted, that I lost sight of what I deserved.” and, “ a great relationship doesn’t happen because of the love you had in the beginning, but how well you continue building love until the end”.

Everyday I love you!

One thing that i wished for is happening. Lately I feel more calm and contented. The sweet words i got from hubby when he say I love you put my mind in peace and heart jumping. This joy that i feel is part of the best that is yet to come. All those sacrifices,  worries and fears of losing the love we had was once again back to how it was before. And love is sweeter the second time around. I can never be thankful enough to God for hearing my prayers and answered it in time. I am blessed to have a family living together in one roof and caring for each other. Our kids are growing fast and being a responsible children. I hope and pray that all the changes we are facing are all for the better and happiness of our family. As time passed by, our marriage growth had been more open and mature. We learned to cherish and love each other whole heartedly and genuinely. We are not just a couple but bestfriends indeed. I wish we could continue to being transparent and our almost perfect relationship this time could last forever. Were lucky to find each other to be partners for life. I love you beyond the universe. No matter where we go, wherever and whatever life throws us we must always hold our hands together in facing it. No retreat, no surrender. 💑😘😇🙏🤗

Something is missing...?

I've been feeling empty inside. Feels like im missing a quarter of my life. I wanted to do things with my family but i dont know where to start and what to do. There is something that my soul and body needs to fulfill. I feel it yet im in doubt if its my insecurities or my anxiety is attacking me. I need to forgive and be forgiven. Im not sure if my hubby will support me too. Well, there is this one dream, one thing that im hoping to do without compromising the feelings of my other half. I wanted to replaced the old unwanted happenings that happened in the past or i rather say to make a new memories of our family in an island adventure that once my hubby done too but not with us. I want to go in that place where we can make up and start our forever. Where there is clear and clean sea water to flush away all those bad decisions we made in the past. That only our family being together can put on good memories and  how it feels to be in that special place in our own setting. I just badly need to replenish my soul, mind and body by the quite nature and sea breeze. I been over fatigue and my body is weary. Im just not voicing it out and complaining but i feel too tired mentally and physically. I also have to do it for my hubby's sake. I want him to relax after hardwork. Have some quite time away from his work load. Make our life balanced. I want to give him good memories with kids and make new plans for our future. I want to make peace with the past and forget all the bad memories and throw away all the pain that is still lingering inside me. This is necessary for us to totally moved on and closed those rotten door that could have tear down our wonderful family. I want to have this vacation for us, new beginning and inspiration. Closing doors of the past and never to be open again. I want to feel how great it is to have each other together. Feeling grateful and thankful for all the blessings and trials in our family life.  Realizing each others worth in our life. One cant live without the other and thats our partnership in this life. Our solemn swear to take care of each other no matter what life throws on us. Together we can make it. Never give up!