Before you argue put yourself first into their perspective.

Life is all a matter of perspective and it all depends on the angle you're looking at it from. Even when two people narrate the same story, both will do it in different ways, which shows that every individual has his/her own view. Sometimes, the hardest thing in the world for any person is to let go of your own perspective and try and see someone else's view. However, people who are capable of doing that come out as a bit more stable as it is easy for them to re-evaluate and appreciate their life by looking at someone else's view of it. Every once in a while you should turn things upside down and look at a situation from somebody else's perspective. It is always good to try and see things differently.
Sometimes it is about the two choices life gives every person; either you sit, sulk and dwell on how unfair life is to you, or you could try and figure out how to make the bad situation work in your favor. Both characters have their own priorities and are happy leading life in their own way. There is no right or wrong point of view. Each person is different and so are their choices, opinions, and decisions. We must learn to respect individuality. We all like to run away from the reality if it does not adhere to what we want in life or how we look at it. People are known to turn a blind eye or a deaf ear towards the truth just because it is harsh and doesn't match their outlook.  It's easy to lose yourself in a pack of millions and follow the path frequently taken. But remember, only if you change how you see yourself, you will be able to change how the world sees you. You may not feel very comfortable when you try to see things from a different perspective, but you have to be on the other side to truly feel what someone else may be going through. Put six people in front of one thing and they will have six different interpretations of that thing. Your interpretation will also change with a change in angle, direction, or position. What would happen if a child takes on the responsibility of the entire household? Will the tiny toddler have an option of being carefree and not worried at all about his/her loved ones? No, right? The battle between the heart and the mind can never be won. Change the way you deal with an object and you could change the entire situation.

The reasons why you should not break-up even if your not inlove.

People with solid relationships struggle in their marriages. Many of the problems come from us making poor choices like not making time for our spouses and a lack of intimacy. There are a few essential ingredients to keep a marriage going. Things like hard work, communication and support goes a long way. But maybe you've done all the right things and are falling out of love with your partner. Or maybe your spouse told you that they are not in love anymore. Does this mean the marriage is over or that you should get a divorce? It is natural to think along those lines. If you believe that the love is gone in your relationship, it doesn't need to be a death sentence for your marriage. Here are the reasons that you should not end a relationship because you believe that the love is gone. First, They Make You a Better Person. Sometimes we get stuck in our lives and this includes our relationship. A bond will make you a better person or make you a worse person. Take a moment to see if the person you are with still brings out the best in you. If you have learned to be a better fighter, a better friend, a better parent or a better neighbor, there is value here. If you guys can still laugh after a fight and keep it civil--keep the relationship going and don't give up. There is something there that is significant and merits saving.  Second, Don't Trust Your Feelings. Feelings are up and feelings are occasionally down. Welcome to life, friend. The same holds true in your marriage. Sometimes you want to be with them and sometimes you want to leave the country for more space. Even then, the miles are not enough. The next moment you are sending loving texts their way. You get the picture. Don't go by your feelings to conclude if you are in love or not. Feelings will lie to you and they will lead you astray. You really can't gauge a relationship by this. Feelings are fickle, so beware on how to move onward. Third, They are Your Go-To Person. If you are going through a tough time, who is the person you go to first? If it is your spouse, obviously there is something there. A healthy relationship is based on a mutual give and take. If you both rely on each other--they're still the first person in your life for support. People search high and low for a person that will be strong and dependable. If you are pissed off at them, it clouds your thinking of how you seemingly do love them. When the dust settles, who are you going to reach out to? If it is your spouse, you have the answer to any lingering doubts. Fourth, You Fight Fair. You are probably fighting as you read this. However, if you can fight fair and without feeling disrespected, unloved or feel that you are in danger because of tempers flying--you guys are better than most couples. If you have the discipline to walk away to cool down and to take a breather, that is a great indicator that you have evolved as a couple. Most fights are not productive. But if you are making headway and you are both hearing each other out, you are making progress. That is half the battle as many times people will draw fights out for lengthy periods of time. Fifth, You Still Communicate. Maybe communication is not the problem, it is how you communicate. There will be times when you don't want to deal with them or they are not listening. This is not an anomaly. People become tired, are working and sometimes don't have a lot to offer. Poor communication is usually the culprit. There could be one who is passive aggressive and doesn't know how to communicate and one who is always communicating but in the wrong way. We just have to find a happy medium where we can get on the same page and establish better communication skills. And last but not the least, You Still Have Feelings for Them. If you search your heart, you know that there is still a spark for your spouse. There was just a disconnection along the way. This doesn't mean you don't love each other or that you are not compatible, it might be a lack of intimacy. You both might need to seek counseling to figure out what happened. The marriage could be renewed as you work through some things. For example, if you are feeling bored in your relationship, start working towards changing it and ask the therapist for advice. A marriage is a commitment, so don't discount or be afraid to ask for help. People fall in and out of love. That is true. But before you claim that you have no love for them, think for a moment before making the wrong choice. In a world that tells us to go with our feelings all the time, we need to become more patient when making the larger decisions when it comes to our marriage.

Transition

I have loved. I have lost and I have changed. It has been difficult but I have learned so much from it. I have learned that people can hurt you so deeply and not even worry about you. I learned that good people can change in a minute when their hearts have been broken. I’ve met great people, but mean people as well. But the most important thing I have learned is that every person in this world is strong enough to let go . People come and go and that’s life! The most important thing is to stand up and realize that you deserve something better than a person who gives up on you.
I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what degrades me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal.
This is the part of my life where I silently remove myself from anyone who hurts me more than they love me, drains me more than they replenish me, brings me more stress than they do peace, and tries to stunt my growth rather than clap for it. I think that I’ve done more than enough talking and trying to make things work with certain people…I’m done.
At the end of life, what really matters is not what we bought, but what we built; not what we got, but what we shared; not our competence, but our character; and not our success, but our significance. Live a life that matters. Live a life with those who are true and really care for you.

"She"

I can tell you a lot about her. She’s someone with a huge heart. She will bend over backwards and fold herself in half helping out someone if she can do anything. Her loyalty to the ones that mean something to her is unheard of nowadays. She smiles like she’s never been hurt, and if you didn’t know her, you wouldn’t ever imagine her to ever be hurt. But it happens, a lot more than anyone realizes. She’s really fragile, and it takes very little for her to be hurt, as she takes everything to heart. I’m not surprised though if you don’t know a lot though, because she’s really cautious and her letting someone close to her is a rare thing to happen. There are demons inside her that she’s constantly in a fight with. And she’s a lot worse to herself than anything that could be said to her. Her past is not one of her favorite subjects. She wouldn’t expect anyone to notice her or to listen to the things she has to say that aren’t necessary to be said. But I’m telling you, she’s so worth it all, she’s nothing you’d ever expect, and you’ll feel alive in a way that you’ve never have with her in your life.
She doesn’t need expensive gifts. She doesn’t need expensive dinners. I mean sure all of those things would be nice but, all she really needs is you. She needs your listening ear when she is ready to vent. She needs your shoulder to cry on when life gets hard on her. She needs your words of encouragement when she is getting ready to pursue her dreams. She needs to be able to feel safe around you, and know that you have her best interest when it comes to her heart. And if it’s taking her a while to let you in, she isn’t trying to punish you. She just doesn’t want to repeat making the same mistakes she has made in the past of giving a man her all, just to find out that he couldn’t match her effort. Love her genuinely. Love her patiently. Love her passionately. And last but not least, love her consistently and in return, she will love you like you have never been loved before.
To her “I love you” means that she accept you for the person that you are, and that she do not wish to change you into someone else. It means that she will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. It means loving you even when you’re in a bad mood, or too tired to do the things she want to do. It means loving you when you’re down, not just when you’re fun to be with. “I love you” means that she know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them, asking in return that you do not judge her for who she is. It means that she care enough to fight for what both of you have and that she love you enough not to let go. It means thinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, and hoping you feel the same way for her. That's all she needed and ever wanted.

Keeping the love alive

Finally, my heart jumps in happiness. I could finally loose my tension slowly now that the king of my heart is returning to what we were before. Im drowning in this feeling of intense love and care he is showing me. Truly action speaks louder than words. I just cant get enough of his everyday gesture in showing how he cant live without my love and care too. I feel like we are lovers again..
Thank you Lord for answering my  prayers. Truly you listen to the prayer of righteous. I know that you will never forsake me because i am your child. My faith is deeper in your promised. I feel grateful for slowly making his heart and mind clearer against immoral acts. Im thankful that he is choosing to do what is right and follow his heart. Im thankful that he gets his realization right on time. Its your perfect timing. All this troubles were going through on our basic needs were just minor problems that makes us grow stronger in faith with each other. Together we are facing the same direction. We are working on our long term goal.. Keeping everyone in our small family happy and enjoy what we have.
I thank you my loving husband for showing me that there is light at the end of darkness. The rainbow comes after the storm. Let us always be thankful and grateful to God for giving our marriage a chance and for providing our every needs. Im contented in whatever you can give us.. Im not asking for more. You are enough for me and our kids. I love you my dear husband, my forever partner and my other half. My life is not complete without you. I promise to be by your side no matter how old we get and when you're weak i will be your strength. I will take care of you just like how you are taking care of us right now. May God blessed you wisdom and knowledge in every decision you will make. Continue to be good and you'll be rewarded in no time. Its God's promised.

Unspoken

There's so many things i want to say. Words that are left unsaid because of fear of being misunderstood and rejection. But its difficult to sustain the feeling of wanting to be heard. Despite all the worry and anxiety i feel the need to write it down. Somehow i want to share with you who can relate to my deepest emotion. If where on the same boat, i hope we can both find the courage to express ourselves. Here goes my situation... Being an open minded person i easily forgive and forget all the bad things that happen and how someone treated me unjustly. I mean treated me not fairly. Sometimes i feel my kindness is being abused. And it hurts the most when that someone who does is the person whom you give your whole life and trust with all your heart. When all the while i thought he is being honest and being a good person doing his responsibilities well but in between those mixed feelings and gestures he is showing me theres still this gap of unpleasant and sometimes can be disappointing because i felt disrespected. And that my existence doesn't seem to matter. I feel out of his decisions specially when it comes to financial matters. He would make decisions and tell me just after and my rights to our supposed to be deciding in partnership manner is being act by him solely. Its just not right and i cant fully appreciate that seemed like being honest manner but its already a late reply on me. Its like he is not giving me a chance to agree or disagree, its all on his. I dont feel like a partner in his life.😢😩 The saddest part of being kind and understanding always. I feel like im just his ego bouncing hard drive. Where he keeps all his sentiments and lifes difficult moments. But i dont complain to be the one to catch all of those. Despite the situation, i honestly appreciate his effort in working things out, fixing the broken pieces that has been shattered. And his being open to me about his dealings with the past and ongoing trouble in our life, a threat in our marriage. I completely believe that he wants to make thing better for our family. And that he realized his faults. Maybe its true that love is blind. I just hope and i pray everyday of my life that he sees me deeper in the core of my heart. How i wanted to be treated with true love, care and understanding. And take me in his every decision he has to make that affects specially our marriage and our family. Hoping to achieved our long term goal. For better or for worst, till death do us apart. We stay together at each others arms. Only death can separate me from you. A promised i make in the name of our children. Forever i will love you my love.

Move-on

The healthy and right kind of love is when two people inspire and uplift each other to become their better selves. If it doesn't serve you its purpose, then its not right for you. Wake up and smell the coffee! Don't settle for minimal respect and effort. Why would you  suffer for someone who doesnt want to be with you? Recognise that we have the power to everything we give life to? If you would stop focusing on wanting love from this person, this agony will end. Stop hoping if he/she is in love with you, it's just hoping. Instead start going out with people who shows love to you and start making choices in that possible direction. Do more of what makes you happy and less of what puts you in misery. Give meaning to your choices. And soon you can recognise that love is something to want to, than for something that doesn't reciprocate. And you will give happiness to those who also ask for you in their life instead. That's 2 way then it will feel fun. Only settle for people who shows you love for who you are. Do things that makes you happy, do things you desire and let you shine through. You need to be beautiful inside out. Be big, bold & beautiful, and believe it. Because if you don't, people will think anything anyways. So just be! haha. If you think your life don't have enough of something, go do it or add it. Like love a furry pet, eat good food, if you enjoy cooking do more of it. So more of what makes you happy. Hang around friends who believe in you and uplift you. That's loving yourself. Don't hold the useless thought of 'WHY HE/SHE DONT LOVE ME'. That's not loving yourself, that's beating yourself up, for ~ that person who's not worth your effort to feel bad for. A lot of people need your love in this world... like...the poorer people. Give them more love, think more of them, and less of him. Haha!
Never get attach to something or someone. Coz' once it's taken away, you will be emotionally drained out. You need to love yourself. If u cannot even love yourself, how can someone else love you. You should also be happy with yourself for being what you are. No matter how you look. Coz' true beauty of a person is based on character, it's skin deep rooted in the core of our hearts. So don't chase or try too hard. Let it come naturally. The longer the wait, the sweeter it  will be. Be happy and stay strong and healthy. Someone is definitely waiting for that special someone (which is you). It probably is not the time yet. Exercise patience. Love is reciprocal in nature....you dont beg to love or to be loved, for whatever is obtained through begging has to be sustained with begging.....so stop chasing shadows!!...i know how it feels to love and not to be loved in return...life is too short to spend time around people who suck the happiness out from you....my advice is that you let go of that person, if he/she comes back his/she's yours, but if he/she doesn't then dont act desperate just know this person was never yours. Love is a conscious feeling two people embark in and strive to grow together in understanding, trust, empathy and commitment, always fighting to make the love work together. Anything besides that is desperation and its not healthy for you!!!

Here.. this same thing happened to a student of my aunt. She came to my aunt and said "teacher I can't study for this very important exam I'm facing because I'm in love. I can't stop thinking about him, sort of crazy.. but I need to pass this exam because this crush will go away but if I fail my exam I wont get it right ever again. Plus he has a girlfriend "

So my aunts advice to her was this. Every "likable" thing there is something to dislike.. every "not very likable " thing there is a side to it which is very likable. It's our responsibility to teach our brains how to see these two sides balanced and win life.. so now you need to see the problems of this crush..because it's never gonna happen between you two. Write down all the reasons why you should forget about him. Write this down and come meet me the next day.

So the girl went home and wrote about it.. she did this until she is satisfied and ultimately defeated that unnecessary pressure and even passed the exam with flying colors.

So write down why you need to stop chasing and hoping for someone who's never yours and why it is not practical. And just move-on.🤔

🤗😇 Goodluck and God bless you. Pray for strength in overcoming all that is not good and not healthy for you. Pull yourself together and be a better version of yourself.

That's all!
Have an awesome week 😀😀

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